This week, I have been mostly using my new bell! I love it. I don't know why I didn't demand one earlier. Any time I need something, I shake on the little bell and wait for service. I could get used to this!
In all seriousness, it's been a strange week again. These first 12 weeks are really quite unnerving as, if you are anything like me, despite having a number of symptoms constantly reminding you you are pregnant, you just don't really quite believe that there is something real growing inside your tummy. The idea that there is is starting to sink in now but I am trying not to think about it or get too excited about it until I get to that first scan and worry slightly less about miscarriage. I'm generally not a worrier but I am 34 and in terms of mummy's and mummy's bodies, obviously it's more risky than it would be if I were 20.
My biggest concern this week has been the size of my tummy already. Now, I know that it isn't big with baby bigness but it's certainly big with something. Obviously my womb is preparing itself to carry something and I am being transformed in to a human vessel which, let me tell you, appears to be a lot of hard work but I wasn't expecting it to grow this quickly. None of my friends had mentioned being this bloated so early on but I was relieved to find, by the power of the interwebs, that I was not alone - for example: http://www.babyandbump.com/pregnancy-first-trimester/22273-bloating-firts-trimester.html
The other particularly noticeable thing for me this last week is the fatigue. I have suffered with ME for about 16 years now so I am used to feeling tired every day but this is different, this isn't just muscle fatigue, I literally can't keep my eyes open. I am feeling like going to bed about 8:30 pm every day and it's taking its toll on me. I feel like quite a wimp really but I guess there's a lot going on inside that must be taking up all my energy.
I've been continuing to do research on the web (but still refuse to read any books) and am really astonished at how quickly the alien in me is developing. I was shocked that my baby's heart is formed and starts beating this week (even though it is about the size of a pin head!). Amazing.
It's a difficult time this first trimester. I am desperate to tell the world - partly because I am excited, partly because I want to explain why I can't drink and partly so I can explain why I am so tired all the time but I know I can't. I have already told far more people than I probably should but I think it will be much easier when I can officially tell everyone and when I properly start showing so that the fact that I just had to buy a size bigger trousers in my lunch hour as my belly was too big for my normal ones, leaves people thinking something other than "Wow, someone had an indulgent Easter".
I am very quickly approaching the 6th week now and I fear the onset of morning sickness may be coming ...
- Frequent trips to the loo
- Very bloated tummy
- Fatigue (much more than normal)
- Sore boobs (and growing by the day - I dread to think what size they will be by the end)
- Light headedness
- Slight nausea (and generally gone off food)
- An even greater intolerance of most people in the world than usual!
To be honest, this week hasn't been too different from the last for me. I've noticed Natalie's fatigue, but I've actually enjoyed going to sleep earlier being at home a bit more. The biggest thing for me at the moment is cigarette smoking. Did I mention that we both gave up smoking as soon as we found out that Natalie was pregnant? It's been almost two full weeks now and although it hasn't been as difficult as I thought it would be, it hasn't exactly been easy either. I've been smoking for - more or less - 30 years; wow, that sounds like a long time. Anyway - I feel much better and running has been a lot easier but sometimes - especially those stressful moments at work - I really feel like having a Dunhill ...
I am now like a tiny tadpole and you can now distinguish my head from my tail. Whilst I am only about 2mm long, astonishingly, my heart starts beating this week!